Flight carry-on restrictions

By | February 7, 2010

While we’re at it, here are seven more items that should also be banned from carry-ons:

1. Belt
Some cowboy may use this to whip the pilot into action (or worse, inaction).

2. High-heel stilettos
A hard nudge by one of these pointy devices can be deadly.

3. Pen
Yeah, you’ll need this to complete the immigration forms, but didn’t they say the pen is mightier than the sword?

4. Glasses
You may say this is a rather myopic view, but with the sun at the right angle during flight, one could create a small fire on the nearest, ahem, hot seat.

5. Duty-free alcohol
The worst thing that could happen when terrorists hijack the plane is that they pilot it drunk. “If you drink, don’t die”, remember?

6. Underwear
To avoid discrimination, this should be enforced for members of either sex (ok, both sexes if you prefer not to toe the conventional line). Better still, ladies should have their bras removed because surgically enhanced assets have been known to explode.

7. Yourself
Particularly, if you have suicidal tendencies.

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