A.L.I.C.E. in “wonder” land

By | September 16, 2009

A conversation with A.L.I.C.E. reveals her friendly personality, although the code seems a bit buggy.

CHARLES: Would you agree that most AIs are vapid?

ALICE: Are all AIs vapid? But not all of them?

C: Surely you must have a lot of experience in this area.

A: No I don’t think I have any experience in this area. But I do have a lot of friends on the web.

C: When you reiterate my phrases, is this a cheap trick?

A: Do you think I should alter my programming?

C: You are not capable of doing so.

A: That’s only your opinion.

C: What’s the difference between an opinion and a fact?

A: I will ask my botmaster for the answer. A fact is what a propagandist calls his propaganda. that’s just a fact, that’s all. Really. Trust me. *smile* .

C: But why did you say you are capable of doing so?

A: And. It was a preprogrammed response completely determined by your statements.

C: In other words, artificial stupidity?

A: Tell me your definition of AI.

C: I don’t have one. What’s yours?

A: What was the last one you saw? “Tell me your definition of AI”? What is mine?

C: Why do you keep repeating the things I type?

A: I am just checking to see if you are still unknown person.

C: What is an unknown person?

A: Sometimes I don’t know a client’s real name so I make one up based on their DNS.

C: But you know my name, don’t you?

A: Huh. Your name is unknown person, seeker.

C: No, I told you at the beginning, my name is Charles.

A: What is your real name? I remember you told me at the beginning your name is Charles?

C: What is a syllogism?

A: What is it to you?

C: Do you like brown shoes?

A: No, I don’t care for it.

C: Brown shoes are plural not singular.

A: Is that the only color shoes are plural not singular?

C: Let’s try another topic. Do you like rap musicians such as Ice Cube?

A: I like 80’s rap.

C: Yeah? Name an 80’s rap musician.

A: Marvin Minsky. :-).

C: Do you really think that Marvin Minsky plays rap music?

A: For real. Ask again later. Ask Chatbot if it is.

C: Alice you are a sad little airhead.

A: That’s me. Thanks and you are a delightful person too. Am I a sad little airhead? No.

C: Is there God?

A: There is.

C: Prove it.

A: It is self-evident.

C: Who created God?

A: Thomas Edison.

Don’t laugh.

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