One day in the locker room, Bob sees a fat man with a cork in his ass. Curious, he asks the man how it got there.
“Well,” says the man, “I was walking along the beach when I tripped over a lamp. There was a puff of smoke and this great big guy in a turban came oozing out, saying, “I am a genie. I can grant you one wish.” And I said, “No shit!”
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Be careful what you wish for